Getting Dumped by Text Message
Getting dumped on text hurts but in most cases the dumping is just a re-affirmation of what is already going on. The relationship probably had problems. The person might have been systematically fading slowly out of your life on purpose hoping you will get the hint. Finally, they lower the boom on text. Or, you finally piss them off and make them snap and they dump you by text in a state of anger. Few people are blindsided by text breakups. They usually see it coming but understandably are still hurt when dumped in this meanie manner.
It’s always a bad idea to respond negatively to the dumping. Don’t send a bunch of pleading, obsessing, begging, hystrionic, or threatening rants back to the sender, even if you are upset. Try to absorb this rude method of dumping and give yourself time to think about it. In some cases, you are getting treated this poorly because you were unable to take a hint prior to this. Once you see that you are being treated poorly don’t ignore the signs and stick around for more disrespectful treatment. The sender might know its rude but felt like he/she had no other choice because you weren’t getting it.
The best way to handle being dumped by text is graciously, or not responding at all. It’s ok to say you feel hurt but you don’t have to take it much further than that. If this is a person you care about you don’t want to burn all bridges with them should the potential to makeup present itself later. For some people they have to remove the person from their lives in order to realize they actually want the person in their lives by virtue of missing them. Don’t burn a bridge just in case the grass is not greener for them on the other side.
Give yourself some time to think about things and process how it all went wrong before you respond by text. Try to distract yourself with other aspects of your life such as work, cleaning house, beauty treatments, the gym, revamping your wardrobe, or other ways of bettering yourself. It might be lonely but if you back off a bit you are leaving two possibilities open. The first is that that your boyfriend or girlfriend will miss you now that they have their freedom. Maybe they won’t meet anyone else so quickly and miss you and regret the dumping. The second is that you will begin the separation process by staying in touch less and getting used to being back with your lonely self again.
It is depressing to get dumped by text but stepping back and not responding while emotions are running high is the safest response. Shhh. Don’t Text. When you don’t text, you are actually saying something too.
Doing the dumping by Text Messge
Are you considering dumping someone by text message? If you are about to break up with someone in this manner (via text) it is good to consider a few factors. If you have only been on a few short dates (no intimacy) for example, in the case of online dating situations, then you really don’t owe this person much explanation. You can tell them that you just are not feeling it and wish them luck. Generally speaking very early meetups resulting from online dating sites don’t usually involve alot of follow up. You can text something polite, yet making the point clear.
If you have been intimate (even after a few dates) it is better to break up over the phone. If you’ve gotten physical and weren’t too much of a coward to do that, then you should not be too much of a coward to let the person know nicely at least by phoning them, that it just is not going to work out for you. It might involve some hurt feelings and honest explanations but at least you are being respectful of another human beings feelings.
One night stands fall into sort of a gray area, where they happen in a flash and people are expected to understand that it won’t go anywhere. In that case, if you feel like you got carried away and suddenly this person thinks it was love at first sight, you are between a rock and a hard place. In these uncomfortable fling situations you may be the text coward to avoid reality, just try to be nice about it.
The longer you’ve been with someone (even if its casual) the more they are deserving of more than a stupid text message breakup. Try to treat them as you would like to be treated. It may take a little more effort, but you won’t feel like a total cad.
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