Women write in regularly asking if the guy they are seeing is actually into them or just trying to use them for sexual intimacy. Typically the pattern is the same, which is that they rarely call, rely on text message to communicate, seem always busy and barely text the girl back once she is hooked.
If this is you ladies and you are dealing with an elusive character and you may have an alpha male on your hands. Alpha males have plenty of opportunity with women and while he is busy purportedly at work, he may have other activity on the side. It’s the other activity (not the job) that is keeping him so busy and untouchable. If you find yourself becoming text dysfunctional with him, you might be looking at a guy who has zero plans on becoming your boyfriend.
The sooner you extricate from the juvenile text games and see the big picture of what is going on, the better off you will be. Alpha males will string you along for as long as you allow it and they tend to be the ultimate time wasters. A guy that only texts you is a major warning flag of a go-nowhere relationship. Here are some alpha male traits to look out for. If you stumble on Mr. Perfect but he won’t even text you back its good to know what you are dealing with rather than rely on hopes, dreams and fantasies. The worst relationship is one where you are fooling yourself into thinking he cares more than he does. Look for these signs of alpha males and think twice before staying involved with a man who is stringing you along without getting more involved with you.
Alpha males have great body language
Alpha males have great body language. They exude confidence and power and they are content with who they are as men. If you are dating a super hot, confident man who never seems to have enough time for you, don’t buy into all his excuses for being able to see you only once every few weeks. Odds are high that he is an alpha male with other action. Rather than sitting by the phone wondering why he hasn’t texted you in a week, you should get yourself out and about and be meeting other men. Why? Because he is doing the same thing and meeting other women.
Alpha males are usually right
Alpha males are usually right and they can justify anything they are doing. They are so right, that if you harangue them about what they are up to, they will turn it around on you and start to criticize a nosy personality. Just know that alpha males inspire the desire to interrogate them because things just don’t add up. Then if you act nosy, that becomes the reason why they don’t text you! If you are dealing with a secretive guy don’t buy into the bull. Find other things to do and stop worrying about his secret life. His secret life is happening, whether you nag him about it or not. Therefore, you may as well pursue other opportunities with men lest you sit home on weekend nights while his life carries on without you much of the time.
Alpha males are so much fun
Alpha males are downright enchanting to hang out with. These are the guys that when you are hanging around them and getting their attention, nothing else matters. They smile and know how to tease and entertain. They have energy and they have enthusiasm. This is the guy that you don’t even have to go out on a date because you have so much fun just having him show up on your doorstep to hang out with you. Be careful though ladies, he’s so much fun he can charm his way out of ditching a dime on a date and will often charm his way into coming over to your place for some physical action and not much else. As fast as he charms the pants right off of you, is as fast as he makes his retreat and disappearance, until next time he needs your services. Alpha males can get you to do just about anything and trust me you will regret it later on. Ultimately he makes you feel used and ticked off at yourself for being bamboozled. With an apha male you will always have this vague nagging feeling of him ripping you off somehow. It’s subtle, but you will feel like he is somehow stealing from you. If you notice the charm and run cycle, beware.
Alpha males are deliberate
Alpha guys are very deliberate in what they are doing. This is the calculating sleeper. When you originally date him, you will be so busy obsessing over him and convincing yourself that this out of your league guy is the one, that you won’t realize he is calculating everything that transpires too. While you are busy have your brain fly out your head, he is sizing you up as a potential girlfriend or casual fling, and finding out exactly what you have to offer him. Are you good for sex, a casual fling, a hit and run, social connections, finances, a potential friend, a lover, a mistress, or a girlfriend he is computing while you aren’t even noticing. An alpha male is a great conversationalist and will lead a conversation but reveal little information about himself. It won’t feel like a probe but rather like a drug hit you that makes you spill beans. To top it off, he will lock in to you making you feel extremely valued when he pays attention to you. When he revokes attention, you feel devalued. An alpha male will be leading the conversation deliberately, while offering very little information. He’ll get sexual intimacy and know your entire life story and financial picture, meanwhile, you won’t even know where he really lives at.
Alpha males are casually persistent
Alpha males are casually persistent and if they see something they want or like in you they will get it come hook or crook. They can escalate a physical relationship just by oozing their sex appeal but at the same time it doesn’t look like they are willfully escalating things. They are physical to the extreme but are more about getting you to want to get intimate than they are about pushing you into anything. They have plenty of experience with women and you are another experience for them. Alphas are really thinking about everything that is going on and they are never lost in the moment, although they want you to be. Alpha males are never needy. They always have other action. If you shoot them down and say no, they will just put their tail down and back off, temporarily. But if they want something, they will come back around. They have an aloof persistence and aren’t fazed by rejection. If you reject them they just recalibrate and become a bit stuck-up. In the meantime, they go off and get a whole other girlfriend. When they come back, you’ll be missing them so much that they may just get what they want out of you.
Alpha males are super funny
Alpha males have a super funny personality and their humor tends to be a chemical drug of attraction for women. This is true wherever they go. They always meet girls and it will breed insecurity in the women who date them. She will feel like she’s easily replaced and walking on egg shells because she knows the second he toddled out the door he is throwing himself into a world of opportunity with other women. Because they can get other women easily, alpha males push the limits of their behavior and never apologize for their rude behavior. This is the guy that cancels the date at 6pm on friday night on you, and if you get upset he criticizes you! He rarely if ever apologizes and he will deliver harsh behavior expecting you to take it politely. If you don’t, he just waggled off onto different adventures for a while. There is no containing or controlling this kind of guy. Therefore, psycho texting him or constantly texting him being nice gets you nowhere. He is going to what he is going to do, regardless of your pathetic machinations to control or influence him.
Alpha males have an aura of mystery
Alpha males always have an aura of mystery. You will feel like you are in a broom closet with him and can’t see the outside of his life other than the little bubble world that exists with you and him. At first this is romantic, like a romantic bubble. But after a while you’ll realize its more like a broom closet, where you are only in a little closet with him and not privy to the entire rest of his life. You’ll find yourself alone with him and getting seduced by him. His basic modus operandi will be to isolate you alone. He will not only physically isolate you but he will mentally isolate you to where you know very little about his life. This is the kind of guy that brings out your worst stalking behavior from following him on the social networks, to constantly googling him, to wishing you could snoop his cell phone. You’ll be working so hard for information that its unreal. This is all information that if a normal guy liked you, would be spewed out like it’s no big deal at all. With an alpha male, you constantly feel like you have a blanket thrown over your head, or that you are hidden in the closet like some sort of mistress. You never, ever feel like a real girlfriend because you aren’t one.
What to do if you figure out he’s an alpha male
If you figure out you are with an alpha male beware. This usually happens 3-6 months in where you are completely text obsessed with a guy that rarely texts you back or makes consistent plans with you. At the point you figure it out, you’ll be going for as long as a week or two with him just being busy. He will pop in then out of your life-like Houdini. He will feed you crumbs of affection just enough to keep you obsessed and addicted. He’ll start to reject you when your insecurity bleeds out into your outward behavior and you start to get pissed off at him. These little spats will last weeks. Pretty soon, you’ll have been intimate with him around six months or so and not even know much about him at all. You’ll have never met his friends or family or have met them only in a very limited way. Your relation won’t have progressed anywhere at all. You’ll be wasting weekend nights waiting and wondering and chewing the eat lobes off your girlfriends obsessing.
If might take as long as a year for you to finally figure out that you are hooking up with an alpha male who will never in a million years become a real boyfriend to you. When you finally come out of the trance and see your alpha male for who he really is, you will undoubtedly hate yourself for having wasted so much time on him. My suggesting about alpha males is to avoid them like the plague during your child-bearing years. These men have a tendency to get women insanely hooked on them. An obsession with an alpha male during the years where you want to marry and settle down to eventually have kids can literally do you in. Waste too many years and your marketability as a catch gets severely affected, not to mention your emotional stability gets thrown off kilter. I know women who never married, and never had children, and who are rather bitter about it. Why? Because they spent years obsessing over a man who was never going to settle down with them. They put their heads in the sand and kept banging their head against the same guys wall, ignoring other opportunities and passing up other opportunities for years on end.
It seems so simple that you waste time on texting and obsessing about texting. However, if you are months into a relationship and wondering why this guy doesn’t text you or keep plans, take a step back. It may seem like fun, but you need to get just as calculating as that alpha male. You need to realize when you are never going to really get what you want out of a guy. You need to know when its time to opt out. So the next time you play the why doesn’t he text me game, take a big giant step back and look at the relationship for what it is. Is this a guy that never calls you and that you can barely pin down on text message? Hmm. Maybe its a guy you would be better off not knowing at all. Hooking up and going nowhere with the local hottie alpha is not the end all be all. Your life, your real life, matters too. If a guy doesn’t care about your life to text you back or keep a plan, he probably does not belong on your life at all.