Are you too nice to her?

Would you utilize game playing as a means of making a woman crave you? It can help your dating style to learn more about the psychology of attracting women. You inner game is the most important component of you ability to attract women. You’ve got good inner game if you are confident, in shape, dress nicely and lead an abundant life style. You have a successful and busy life that a woman will be automatically drawn to. A man with inner game naturally attracts women to him.

Game players

There are techniques for seducing women which also focus on mind games and various strategies to get women begging for attention from you. Game playing includes everything from freezing a woman out and ignoring her, to refusing to commit to her, to being indifferent to her. Such strategies are said to elicit increased attraction from her. The goal is to make her crave you.

There are a plethora of seduction mind games that one can employ. They include schemes such as freeze outs, disqualifiers, negative attention, ignoring, closing, and so forth are despicable dating tactics. For example, a freeze out means that you ignore her. A disqualifier means that you rule her out for example saying she lives too far so that she in turn tries to convince you its not a problem. Negative attention means you tease her thereby differentiating yourself from other men who merely compliment her. Ignoring her means you ignore her deliberately. Closing means that you succeed in having an intimate encounter with her within the first few dates. These techniques sound so mean indeed however many of these concepts do help to create attraction. It all comes down to the old adage that women want to go after what they cannot have nor control.

Game haters

Then there are those who hate game playing and find it to be despicable when men utilize such dating tactics. Game haters believe that all a man has to do is just be himself and refuse to play mind games with women. They believe that games only serve to toy with women in order to fulfill an agenda of seducing her quickly. They feel that what it really amount to is taking unfair advantage of a woman’s emotions.

Do mind games work?

So, where does the truth lie. Are mind games mean and dubious or is there a certain element of psychological truth to such dating strategies? Are women more attracted to men that play hard to get? If that is true, does playing hard to get make her crave you more? To a certain extent, everything in life is a game, like it or not. As they say, all is fair in love and war. A hint of games playing can indeed create chemistry and attraction and there is no harm in that. As long is it is done without malicious intent, having a little bit of game in you can indeed make you more attractive to women.

Here are a few thoughts on the ethics and effectiveness of using emotional mind games (including text games) to get her more addicted to you.

Nice guys finish last when it comes to igniting passion

Being nice to a woman goes a long ways towards making a relationship work. However, the sad truth is that being nice does not always attract women. Women will date a nice guy all day long. But to make her really crave you, a woman needs to feel a gut wrenching level of emotion for a man. It may not be fair and it may not be right, but women are less likely to have these gut reactions to the nice guys. Creating a bit of drama and tension in a relationship can enhance the chemistry between two people. A nice guy who acts consistently vanilla may not be generating that spark with his consistent behavior. It pays to be a bit spontaneous and unpredictable sometimes.

Nice guys finish first when it comes to being marriage material

Once a particular woman has been played around by a few bad boys, she may decide to change her ways and only date the nice guys. In fact, she’ll seek out the nice guys as marriage material. This is when her logic takes over her emotions. She wants a man she can trust for the long haul. Therefore, being the nice guy still gets you marriage minded girls that want to be in a serious relationship. But such a woman may never feel that insane animal attraction for the pure nice guy. She has the crazy mad passionate emotional desire for the bad boy because the way he acts fuels her attraction. She marries the nice guy however, because the way he acts attracts her logical maternal side and desire to settle down with someone reliable and consistent.

The bad boy

The bad boy is that charming man who has no problems seducing women. They have the good looks and the charm along with the dating experience to seduce women that they aren’t even seriously interested in. They will seduce a woman just to seduce her and for no other reason. This is the man who dates all types of women for the mere pleasure of the pursuit. When a man conquers a women that he really has no interest in, he is playing with her emotions. These are the worst type of bad boys because they become skilled at duping women into intimate encounters with the promise of something more, then never delivering more. Such false intentions are truly mean and the seduction techniques that these bad boys employ are nothing more than emotional trickery.

Creating attraction

If you are truly interested in a woman, it never hurts to employ a few bad boy strategies to make her more attracted to you. If your intentions are genuine and you like her, then employing a few bad boy skills can actually make your relationship with her more exciting. That can be good for her too. If you understand the psychology of attracting women it can definitely help you out at the outset of a relationship. You want to have what it takes to attract that gorgeous woman that you are interested in. There is nothing wrong with employing behaviors that increase your chemistry with her. As long as your agenda is authentic and you goal is not to use somebody, then having a hint of bad boy in you can be a good thing.

Don’t be a user

A little game playing can enhance your chemistry with her there is no doubt about that. But you should not cross over the threshold to where you treating someone poorly. Once you are in a relationship with someone and get to know them, there comes a time when the games should really be dropped altogether. If you have time and consideration invested into a girl and she’s dated you for a while, a certain threshold level gets reached where if you continue to play games with her you are just being mean to her. An example of being deliberately mean would be if you have more than one girlfriend and you deceive each into thinking you two are serious to reap short term benefits without any intention of ever getting serious. Playing these types of games, particularly with someone who has time invested in you and can get seriously hurt by your behavior, is not ethical.

Try 2 steps forward, 1 step back, to make her attracted

Wearing your emotions on your sleeve does not create attraction. In fact, if you come off to a women as altogether smitten, she will probably get scared of your tsunami of emotions. If you are smitten with a woman, adopting a game of 2 steps forward and 1 step back can actually help to keep you from coming on too strong. Even though it’s a game, it’s a game that is actually beneficial. Not only will it create that spontaneity and component of unpredictability that women long for, it will temper your own emotions and slow you down from getting too hooked. It’s a win/win for both the man and the woman. As counter intuitive as it may sound, women fall hard for the confident man that teases her, comes and goes, acts willing to walk away from her, and even tries to get rid of her every now and then.

All that you need to do to employ the 2 steps forward, 1 step back, is to advance the relationship and pull back a bit every step of the way. You get close to her, then go for a few days without touching base. This lets her feel the positive attention while at the same time giving her periods of time where she feels your absence and gets a chance to really miss you. If you applied that idea to text messaging, you would want to message her sometimes and then not message her sometimes. Keep a little bit of spontaneity in your communication patterns. A woman will be way more intrigues by a man that texts her once a week than she will by a man that texts her three times a day like clockwork.

If you take two steps forward and one step back it will prevent you from coming on too strong.

If either of you become too complacent, shake things up a bit

Have you ever noticed that when someone you like blows you off it makes you want them even more? People always want what they can’t have and both men and women love a challenge. When you become too comfortable and stop being a challenge to your partner you can find yourself falling into complacency. Comfort is good, but boredom is not. If you become too predictable and constantly contact a girl with formulaic reliability it makes you look needy. Instead of texting her all the time and being at her emotional beck and call, be a challenge and make her work a little bit for your attention. This will make her want you more. You always want to avoid complacency in your relationships. When a woman comes to expect you to behave a certain way is just when you should be doing something unexpected. Don’t let your girlfriend become complacent and take you for granted. If you feel she takes you for granted it’s time to get busy with other things. She’ll notice the change in behavior and it will keep her on her toes.

Being busy and sometimes unavailable works best if you really do have an abundant life, friends and family functions happening aside from her. The more of your own life you have, the more non-needy you will come off. You can fake busy-ness to a certain extent, but if you find yourself faking it then its time to focus on making it. Go out and get a life outside of just your relationship with her which means friends, sports, and alone time that you enjoy. Instead of faking busyness, work on making yourself busy by getting involved in other activities. The more you have your own life going on the more interested in you she will be. She’ll be vying for your attention and it won’t be a game you are playing with her because you will be authentically busy.

Communication sporadically

Obviously you have to communicate with a woman to show her that you are interested, to get her to go out with you, and to keep her interested in you. So communicate with her, just don’t always do it on an expected time clock or in a regular pattern. If she emails or texts you, make sure to wait a while and think of what you really want to say to her.

Don’t always shoot from the hip and text or email or call her back right away. Wait a while. Don’t let your girlfriend turn you into a girlfriend. If she starts to have too many gossip sessions with you it’s time to back off. Leave her something to talk about with her girlfriends. Being her best girlfriend who listens to everything on her mind is not part of your job description. Keep communications down to a minimum and always communicate with an objective in mind such as making plans. Don’t allow yourself to become her girlfriend.

Put aside your shortcomings and be willing to take risks

Every time you get in the car and drive down the street you take a basic risk that you are going to hit somebody or that they are going to hit you. And if that happens, it’s a chance you take because you want to drive the car to get somewhere. Likewise with dating, every body is going to have their physical dilemmas and cross to bear. Whether its that you are losing your hair, not too tall, not well endowed physically or not gainfully employed, there is always something that can be putting you at a disadvantage.

Focusing on your problems is not a solution for being the confident man you need to be. You have to get over your shortcomings and be more willing to take rejection risks. Even if you get rejected, shut down, laughed at, or blown off by a woman you need to let it roll off your back. If a woman doesn’t seem interested in you then you need to be able to turn your back on that and take a walk and try again with someone who is. That ability to turn your back on a woman actually makes you more desirable to her.

Don’t let rejection upset you

Once you are dating someone you need to keep them on a long leash and even if you feel insecure that they will dump you, you don’t want to let them know that! If you remember those Ronald McDonald blow up plastic punching toys the kid hits it and it bounces right back up. With women you need to act that same way. If you get rejected you just bounce back up. Bad boys learn their dating skills by enduring all sorts of rejection. They just keep trying until they learn what works with women.

Even if you have to fake your confidence a little bit, it is worth it. Fake it until you make it. There is nothing wrong with faking it however always keep in mind that real confidence is going to come off as way more authentic and attractive to her than something which you are faking. If you are faking it then get busy creating other dating options for yourself so that you are making it. Don’t be afraid to blow a girl off, let her marinate in her own juices for a while, and actively pursue other women to date if she doesn’t act interested enough in you.

Push and pull

You know what it is like when someone takes your food away right before you are done with the best part? People don’t want things given to them and then taken away from them. That makes them value the thing that was taken away even more and then they want to hoard. The same thing goes for attention. You might be interested in a girl and get her number then call her then blow her off for a while. When she finally runs into you or gets in touch with you she is going to be all the more eager to now have that chance to hang out with you and enjoy your company. Your company can be extremely valuable to a woman so make sure she relishes it by giving her the having it verses not having it sensation. It’s like push pull. You give a taste of your affection then you get busy and she has a chance to miss you. Then when you show back up she relishes it. Women can get too acclimated and then spoiled by having constant attention showered on to them. It’s good to do a little bit of push and pull to make a woman cherish their time with you more and value your affection more. Don’t always be at her beck and call.

On game playing

Game playing does work however where it becomes insidious is when you play games to meet a self serving agenda or to ruthlessly use somebody and to cast them aside. There is a threshold at which point you should quit playing games if such games will deeply hurt someone you care about. Faking confidence it can be mildly effective but true confidence it is even more effective. Claiming you are busy is way more believable when you actually are busy. Acting non-needy is more believable when you really are non-needy and have other things going on in your life including dating options besides just her.

If you wear your heart too much on your sleeve it can come off as a little bit too much of a sure thing and sorry to say, boring. Be sure to be spontaneous, push and pull on her, bust her chops from time to time, play and get egotistical once in a while. If you find yourself faking high energy with her than get busy trying to make yourself more busy for real. Create more of a life for yourself so that your confidence comes from a place of authenticity. Lastly, keep her on her toes.

Women love excitement

Yes you might play a few games, because women do like a little bit of a roller coaster ride. A few climbs, descents, sharp turns and a rush is exhilarating for them! I’ll give you a secret that the one man that messed me around the most of any man ever in my life, hands down was the man that I loved the most out of any man in my life. And yes he was the one that I constantly wanted to text message.

Don’t be afraid to try a few games out and see how they work and if they increase attraction between the two of you congratulations. Use discretion when playing games and don’t ever lower yourself to delivering emotionally harmful behavior. Always take care of your girlfriends heart. If you take games too far a girl will either get seriously hurt or leave you for fear of being treated poorly, so never ever go overboard. Beware of learning all of the attraction techniques because then you’ll be reading the sections on how to deal with a stalker. Women will flock to you. Scary!


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