If there is one sure thing I have figured out having read some 1000 or probably more articles on text messaging, and authored hundreds of posts on texting etiquette, dating and relationships, it is this.
If he texts you more than calls you, stop seeing him
Remove the texting men from your life and eliminate them from your dating sphere. You’ll save so much time it is not even funny. Forget the dating books just use this one simple rule that if he texts you more than calls you just stop seeing him! This will have a double win, win benefit to you. First, it will get rid of men who are just gaming and not really interested in you therefore wasting your precious time. Second, it will train men that in order to deal with you they are going to have to use the phone. A phone call, is not too much to ask for. I am not the only woman who has figured this out. Every women who has been in a go nowhere relationship knows this. That’s why, if you go onto a web site for desperate and not so desperate singles like plenty of fish or even the more upscale paid dating sites like match dot com you will see that over 75% of the women say right in their profiles that they prefer phone calls and a relationship over text messages. Why do they say that? Because in their experience guys that are into relationships make phone calls, and guys that are just playing around and not serious text.
Dump all men that text
It’s like a simple epiphany that I just had after written hundreds of articles all about texting, obsessive texting, and texting relationships. The epiphany is to dump all men that text. OK, that is a bit extreme since occasional texting can be sort of fun. So, lets make it more reasonable and realistic since pretty much all dating men use text message these days, and you need to ostensibly meet one or more of them in order to date some one. So, just stop engaging with men that text you more than they call you. That gives them some wiggle room to text you for fun. The minute they exceed that threshold and they text you more than call you, stop dating them. Get rid of them. Totally dump them out of your life. Basically, never ever talk to them one more time in your life unless of course, they call you. If they call you and go back onto the plan of calling more than texting, you can accept them back into your life again if you feel like it.
50/50 Texting/Calling Rule plan
OK here is the rule once again. The minute a man texts you more than he calls you, remove him out of your life. This removal can be temporary or permanent, depending on whether he calls you. Stop texting with them and pretend they are dead to you. Don’t respond, don’t acknowledge. Then, the minute they call you again and manage to stick to the basic program of calling you more than texting you, you can consider letting them back into your life.
It’s best to implement this plan at the get go of your relationship but you probably didn’t do that if you surfed google and arrived here. Doesn’t matter. Implement the plan starting now if you are having problems with a man that only texts. Just implement it. If you feel like it you can let him know about it but it really doesn’t matter if you tell him or not. Just do it. He will quickly get the picture whether you give him a specific warning or not. I would not get into a fight with him over it either. Instead, act like its an exciting and fun new development. Wow, I really like you but have you noticed that we always text nowadays? It would be great if we talked on the phone more than texted that would be so totally cool I love your voice so call me too. Then, implement plan like your life depends on it. Stick to the plan going forward. Now lets go into why this plan actually works.
Texters are usually bad boy game players who deserve to get broken up with because that teaches them to either go away or call you at least as much as they text you
In all seriousness, a man that is interested and respectful is going to call you. The minute you allow some lesser behavior, the man will sink to it out of convenience. If you allow conversations and dates to get planned on text one single time even, you’ll find yourself regularly having conversations and dates planned by text. And that down manages your relationship. Who wants a non-boyfriend that only texts. Texts every once in a while to touch base or flirt are fine, but don’t you want phone calls too? By establishing the 50/50 dating and texting rule, you are constantly and continually teaching the man to place phone calls too. If he goes away because you aren’t worth calling then he did not value you enough and probably wanted to go away anyways. So let him disappear into the puff of magic smoke from whence he came. Magically disappear him and help him out by politely showing him the door.
What if the man leaves when you implement the rules
If you have to break up with him and remove him from your life because he violated the 50/50 texting rule and started texting more than calling, you are saving yourself a giant headache and moreover you are saving yourself potential heartache too. Better yet, you are teaching how you wish to be treated and he is more likely to treat you better if he sees you have standards. Because in my experience a man that primarily texts you isn’t interested in a real relationship. Furthermore, the more he texts you the less your relationship progresses because you aren’t communicating by even talking.
It’s really not a big deal at all to execute this plan. All he has to do is start calling you again and you can let him back into your life. If he starts texting you too much you can even just let him know. Tell him, look, texts are fun and cute and all but I don’t want a relationship that exists all on text. I like text but it makes me feel comfortable that you care if you call me at least as much as you text me is all. If he actually really likes you, he won’t think it’s a big ordeal. He’ll put in some phone calls. In my experience relationships go better when people are talking on the phone together and spending time together. Texting is just an icing on the cake of that. Texting is not however, the cake. Hence, the 50/50 rule. It will help you get rid of the players who don’t really want relationships.