Flirting and texting

Sexting happens when you and a friend start to send suggestive texts to one another including sending provocative photographs and then they would do the same. Friends with benefits typically signifies a relationship that is purely physical that both people agree to. With the sexting, the physical interchanges happen via text message conversations.

Once you start explicit texting, it is hard to turn back

Sexting can be fun and flirtatious when it comes to two adults who are a couple and enjoy the flirty electronic exchanges. Its silent, secretive and can be alot of fun particularly if one partner is out of town or far away and there is no possibility of seeing one another. It is best to never sext too early in a relationship. Leave sexting to when you are in a very solid ongoing relationship that is healthy and well established.

Couples often video chat through technology such as skype and IM, however texting can come in handy when you aren’t looking your best and don’t wish to be on large video. The messages are secretive, flirty and private. So if it is as much fun as this why isent’t it considered a good thing for a new relationship? I will tell you why. Once you establish a sexting pattern with your partner it puts you in danger of heading your fledgling relationship towards being purely sexual and that may not be a good thing at all.

Is sexting harmful for your relationship? Yes

Sexing could hurt your relationship because once you establish a sexting partner you may find that your electronic communications always take a turn from g-rated to downright naughty. In fact, once you accept that you are ok with sending and recieving sext messages your partner may become a little bit too used to it for your liking. Pretty soon you won’t be talking about you day anymore. You’ll be talking about fantasty instead. Before you know it, you could be getting used as a mental jump off for your friends private pleasure. How convenient for them that they can have you via text without putting in the effort of lifting the phone up much less coming to see you and take you out. If this the pattern you really want to enable?

Keep flirting to the imagination

First of all you shouldn’t be sexting at all of you happen to be underage that goes without saying. Second of all, even for older men and women sexting sends the wrong message of your self opinion. It may seem like fun at the time but if you get too carried away you are setting yourself up to be viewed as a sex object for pleasure and not a girlfriend or boyfriend. If you want to be a fantasy girl or boytoy thats fine but you have to really figure out if you want to take things this far.

If you want a real relationship, stay away from sexting

If you want a bf/gf relationship and not just a play toy I would not venture deep into sexting no matter how tempting it is. It’s 20/20 hindsight. Most people that have gotten into sexting with their friends will agree that they regret it after the fact especially if they were looking to become a real bf/gf.

Text Now, Regret it later

If you get into a sexting pattern with your friend you might find yourself gravitating from exchanging racy messages to explicit photos to actually masterbating and mental self pleasuring for even a few hours per week. It is not real contact and it can lead you to think you are more of a couple than you really are. It is definitely not the same as being there and being together with someone. Generally speaking, sexting is a bad idea in the long run particularly for women. It is going to make your friend view you in one light and in one light only.

Sexting can not only estabish yourself as the jumpoff for your friend, it can also get you into hot water. Whether it be hot water with parents, friends or the person who actually is your boyfriend or girlfriend in the event where you are cheating on them behind their back by sexting someone else. It will get you into hot water one way or another. You don’t want to be considered as the one to talk to only when its time to get frisky. If you sext now and decide later you want to stop doing it the person who you were sexting will not respect you anew because you had a sudden change of heart. A person will not accept new boundries as readily as they would if boundries were set down and adhered to from the get go.

Flirting is always better than Sexting

If you want to have a real relationship and have the person take you seriously I would not allow your text messaging to denigrate into sexting. I don’t think becoming a sext object for your friend will help them develop caring feelings about you. In my experience if you have a sexual relationship on text message you can predict that your relationship with this person will never make it past a sexual context. So while sexting is fun and all, it won’t help your relationship status one bit. You’ll be pigeon holed into the fun category.

There is a difference between sexual feelings and caring feelings. That being said, fun flirty messages are not a problem. Just keep it out of explicit level, and leave something to the imagination. One way to censor your messages is to imagine if your gf/bf lost their phone or his friends read his messages. Would you want them to see all the messages that you have texted them? If not, re-edit and don’t send anything too naughty.

There have been studies done that when men see women in skimpy clothes they categorize her as a fun time girl and not marriage material. If you apply that concept to sexting then you wouldn’t want texts, pictures or videos that were too skimpy to get you slotted in as a play thing.

The same thing goes for men though not quite as much. A woman is going to see you as a boytoy not a real contender if you get too in the gutter with the sexting. She’ll think its fun at the time but later on she might realize it was distasteful. Therefore if you are the guy its best to protect your integrity not to mention your girlfriends integrity by refusing to go off the deep end sexting. Save it for your real get togethers in private.

Sexting is the type of thing where it seems really fun at the time but if you look back on it you usually regret it. If your relationship does not develop as you wanted or becomes purely sexual you will definitely regret any sexting you did. You’ll feel like you gave yourself up without even requiring this person to come see you or phone you much less be in a relationship with you. Also your sexts could fall into the hands of someone other than the intended. Granted if you aren’t Tiger Woods mistress they aren’t going to be sold to the local tabloid, but they may be seem be some unwanted eyes nonetheless.


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One Response to Flirting and texting

  1. Pingback: Love texting tips | Love Dating How to Text

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