Have you ever pushed so hard on your girlfriend or boyfriend that they started sending you texts to the effect of I can’t do this anymore, or … I am done? Such texts usually indicate the height of them being fed up with you. If you are getting these type of texts you need to stop your behavior. You are driving this person into wanting nothing to do with you. Next thing you know, your texts will be ignored altogether and communication all but cut of. Your boyfriend or girlfriend could really be done, or be giving you some sort of test wherein they expect you to at least back off and take a hint that they have had it for now. Here are some tips for what to do in the event that you have pushed your boyfriend or girlfriend this close to the brink of a breakup.
Stop blowing up your girlfriend or boyfriends phone with text messages
The first thing you are going to want to do is to take these I can’t deal with this anymore texts seriously and completely back off for a while. Back off means back off. Usually when you are pushing a boyfriend or girlfriend you just have issues that you want to compulsively nag them about. You want to prove a point. You want to air all the poison in order to make up. You go quiet, stew for a while and then like a simmering pot of water, you come to a boil and start blowing up their phone with text messages again. While all of this might seem like you must text and explain yourself, the only thing that it will do is destroy a relation that is already hanging by a thread. You won’t be able to text your point through to them. Harassment never works.
If your ex continues to blow you off month after month after month you probably need to accept it. Being a text stalker really won’t help your cause. Being in a weird one-sided relationship where you text them your feelings and they ignore you is completely dysfunctional and abusive. Back completely off and regroup instead. Try some of the next steps that are mentioned below to get a grip and gain a fresh perspective. Get your own life together, post pictures on your social sites, go out and have fun, and date other people.
Start posting pictures on your public profiles and make a point of having fun with other people
Whenever you have to disengage with someone who you have become obsessed with, you are going to struggle. The compulsive element about texting is that you just send a text sort of as an underhand. You get right to them, without having to call or having them pick up the phone. It’s like a direct route to their brain. Instant gratification. But when you are texting someone who doesn’t want to hear from you it becomes an annoying slap in the face on their end. They have to get annoyed by you, or even go to the trouble of blocking you. If they have told you to leave them alone and you disrespect that, they begin to think you are a psycho. What you need is a total distraction, so you can disengage from them.
Try taking up some projects, goals or activities that you have been putting off. Even if this is a house project, you can tackle it to keep your mind on something else. Try to go out with some other friends. Go through your social profiles and update pictures and old comments to give yourself a fresh image. Post new pictures. Think of fun things to do that will give you opportunity to take some new pictures. Get a puppy. Take a class. Make up with an old friend and get together with them. Meet up with an old high school friend. Do things that will keep you busy and as happy as you can be given the circumstances. Men and women can start working out or go on a health kick to combat the obsession depression. Women can also take up some beauty treatments to feel better about themselves.
Make a point of freshening up your entire persona, and update your photographs, to sort of turn over a new leaf. Looking and feeling good are always the best revenge. Take advantage of this down time to improve yourself. The great part about this is that your ex boyfriend or girlfriend will definitely see you carrying on fine without them. The bonus is that you are accomplishing things for yourself. Even if they are seeing new people, they might start to miss you if a new relationship doesn’t work out for them. All you can do is move forward and try to be happy taking the focus off of them and back onto you. Your life matters. What you do matters. Your social networking matters. Stop staring into their life and start focusing back on your own life instead. Pick up the pieces.
Disappear from contacting them and change certain things about yourself
I don’t know what it will take for you to hit the cut button, but hit it you must. Stop texting your boyfriend or girlfriend, stop explaining yourself, stop questioning what right they have to be this upset with you, stop hating them for pulling the rug out from under you. Just stop. If you push anymore you will not get the result that you are looking for. Back off and do your own thing for a while. If your boyfriend or girlfriend really is done with you, you will find out soon enough. Leave them alone for a couple of months. Do they bother to contact you? If you touch base gently do they jump at the opportunity to talk to you or simply continue to ignore you? Dropping out of sight for a while can tell you a lot.
It’s possible your ex met someone else but they may come back if it does not work out for them. This could take months of them evolving all the way through a few new relationships and dating others. Don’t worry about what they are doing. Try to focus on you and changing parts of you that helped lead to this breakup. It is possible you were too pushy and just smothering your ex. Some time apart can really help you revamp yourself. You could become softer, easier to communicate with, quieter. You could get your emotional act together. You could have time to think and identify things that you can control, which is yourself and your own behavior and responses. You can’t control what the boyfriend or girlfriend does but you can change your own behavior and attitudes for the better.
Whether you want to get back together with them, or just get on with your miserable life without them, leaving them alone is probably the best bet. Stalking and harassing them gets you nowhere. You need time for bitterness, anger and jealousy to completely wear off. Get to a place of acceptance and serenity and then work on your own personality traits that will make you more of a catch in the future. If he or she does come back around you can show them that you really have changed nevertheless. Backing off, and changing for the better, are the two things that you can do to help get them back.
Date other people
A jealousy plot line can work wonders when your boyfriend or girlfriend pushes you away. The fact that you can move forward and make some other friends, date other people, and stay away for long periods of time seemingly happily, will help them to miss you. Dress well, post pictures, get back onto a dating site looking fabulous, or do a makeover. You ex will wonder about you after a while. When their anger dissipates they might wonder what you are up to, start thinking about you, become jealous, and then be more receptive to actually making up or rekindling things. Missing you can make them forget about your shortcomings and get them interested in you once again.
Remember not to despair if your ex is dating someone new. It’s true they have a distraction and likely won’t experience the separation or loneliness pain like you experience it. But most relations do not work out. Within a few months or a year that relationship may fall by the wayside. They may come back. In the meantime, work on being fabulous and creating other opportunities for yourself. If they come back your wounds will be healed, and you will look amazing. You will have changed some of the toxic elements of your personality and you will be ready to get back with them better than ever if that is what you still want to do.
Sometimes all you have to do is step back and work on bettering yourself. The rest will come naturally from there. Remember that couples break up, date other people and wind up back together all the time. People also meet new people they like better than ever but that just takes a little time. It may seem lonely now but things will pick up again they always do. In the mean time you must respect that you boyfriend or girlfriend got fed up with you. Take advantage of this unwanted break and use it to your advantage. You never want to get No for an answer. It is a rejection. But what really empowers you is being able to accept that rejection and move forward graciously.