Have you become pathetic and needy because you sense your boyfriend is pulling away from you? Did you have an argument over the issue and now find yourself texting and texting and he doesn’t even bother to respond? The key to getting him back is to remain calm and keep your cool. Getting over emotional will drive him away from you.
Women tend to become teary eyed, needy pushovers when they sense their boyfriend is fizzling on them or possibly even ready to break up with them. Sadly, the more crying, baby-like and pathetic the woman becomes the more the man gets turned off. If you feel you’ve tried everything and are at the pile of mush stage over your man then maybe these three last-ditch tips will help you turn things around.
Try a power shift
Just when you think being a cry baby will help you save a relationship is when you should probably be executing a move that is 180 degrees from crying. It’s the pull out the plug on them maneuver. An analagy is that you are continually trying to clean say a carpet(your man) and it just won’t become nice no matter you do. You keep trying to get it to be nicer but in actuality it needs to get replaced altogether. So you stop trying to do what you were doing and go out and search for something new.
It’s not that you have to ditch your boyfriend or beat him to the breakup punch. It’s more that you do a 180 on your pathetic clingy behavior and well, flick him off. If he really wanted to fizzle out on you then your abandoning the cause might let him breathe a sigh of relief. If, however, he likes you a little bit still then the sudden shift in your clingy old behavior will peak his interest. Think about it. What is he going to do. You go from begging and pleading to ejecting yourself out of the situation altogether. All of a sudden you are throwing him a loop. He might be happy without you for a while but odds are that he’ll start to wonder what you are up to within a few weeks time.
If your relationship is going no-where fast it can really be an eye-opener to execute a power shift on your man. All of a sudden you go from losing yourself and acting like you can’t live without him, to not falling for or putting up with his shenanigans altogether. You can do this without saying anything to him at all. Just back off and start doing the opposite of whatever you were doing that wasn’t working.
If a woman sees a man heading for the relationship door she usually pulls out all the stops to keep him around. That means doing him favors, being nice to him, acting like a doormat and trying her best to act like Ms Good even while he’s literally turning his back on her.
It is counter-intuitive yet if you abruptly stop giving, stop being needy, and stop acting like a pushover it is going to be more effective than chasing after him and trying to wrap yourself into a donut accommodating his fickle needs. If you do become selfish then you can expect your man to react negatively for a while and maybe even disappear.
But if you stick to your guns, eventually he will miss the nice you and wonder where she went. Many dating experts will swear to god that if you love yourself more than him it actually helps attract him back to you! Relationship experts call this loving yourself or not giving more than you are getting. You can simplify that advice into merely acting selfish. Because the moment you become more selfish you are essentially not giving, and definitely not giving more than you are getting.
Odds are that if you are grasping at straws to hang on to a man you’ve totally lost sight of your original personality that got you the man in the first place. You’re going to do a power shift and stop the chase. Then you’re going to become way more selfish and stop giving. This total about face might perk up his interest. If he doesn’t disappear into the sunset and his curiosity brings him back around, then you need to slam dunk your original personality that attracted him to you.
Most likely, you had a loving, passionate and engaging personality when he first waltzed into your life and fell for you. That’s what you want to recover if and when he does bother to spend time with you. Men can be sort of simple and if your relationship has become all about arguing about your relationship it’s going to erode it down to nothing. Try doing something engaging or silly instead and getting back to having fun. Get back to being a fun person to be around.
Hopefully you’ll be able to execute a power shift and set boundaries for a more selfish focus which will help you stop chasing him away and stop being at his beck an call. Quit texting him and trying to talk or work anything out. Quit initiating. You’ll throw him for a loop and get back on his mental radar. if you couple your new self respect with a genuine effort to show your original, shining personality when he does appear, it may just get him back into you. Good luck!