Sometimes breakups are succinct and easy to interpret. The man says that he just isen’t interested in you, or worse yet that he has met and wants to spend time with someone else. You usually take this sort of direct explanation at face value, and move on. The problem is that men usually say something a lot more nefarious than I am just not interested, or I have met someone I like better and want to be with. If his breakup reasons are flimsier, there may be things you do and changes you can make to save your relationship.
The I need more space breakup excuse
If a guy says that he needs more space, he really is on the brink of breaking up with you but hasn’t as of yet. This is the easiest relationship breakup to save. If he says he needs more space then the way to stop the breakup is to listen to what he says and give him more space.
Men love calling the shots and running the relationship on their terms. A girl who really can give a guy space when he asks for it will reign supreme in his book. He’s expecting the opposite when he asks for space. He’s expecting you to ask questions about why, why, why and to text message him all the time and try to get closer. This only causes him to pull away and confirms in his mind that you are too clingy and that he should break up with you.
If you want to stop the breakup and he asks for more space then fall into line and give him what he wants no questions asked. Only when he comes around into your territory should you talk about how you feel, for example, that you miss him.
Also keep in mind that men can get cold feet on commitments and if he feels like you are texting messaging constantly, calling him, assuming plans or acting entitled he will get defensive. If you don’t freely let him go with his buddies he will want space really fast. If he’s asking you for space then you are crowding him, plain and simple. Stop crowding him. Let him come to you and stop texting, questioning and contacting him so much.
If he asks for space you are suffocating him and aggresively pushing him into a relationship where he just wants to date. Stop pushing and respect what he asks for. He will be impressed that you can actually listen to what he wants you to do, and do it. Get busy with your own life and leave him alone. If you do this, he should come back around in no time. You may not even breakup at all.
Getting more emotionally involved for some men is scary and he doesn’t want to be pressured. He wants to go in and out of that cage of yours at will. He doesn’t want to feel smothered or like he is losing his autonomy and freedom. He doesn’t want to deal with a spy, a snoop, a stalker, or a nag. He doesn’t want an electronic tracking device strapped to his ankle. He doesn’t want to have to get a text message ten times a day asking how he is or what he is up to or why won’t he do this or that or worse yet, accusing him of not caring about you.
If he feels trapped you can be sure he will bolt. So be sure to let him be his own man, a free spirit that sees you on his terms because he enjoys your company. Give him more space than he even asked for in the first place and show him that he is going to miss having you around. Remember that right before you become more serious he might be asking for the most space of all. Think of him as standing on the edge of a cliff.
If he asks for more space he is giving you a kind warning clue that you are crowding him. Don’t crowd him, and he may just stick around. Men love it when women listen to what they want, so now is your chance to show him that you can give him more space if that is what he wants.
The its not you its me breakup excuse
Dating experts regularly remind women that when he says it’s not you, it’s his way of trying to shoulder the blame for the breakup in an effort to appear civil and more respectful of the fact he is about to dump you. He doesn’t want to hurt you in other words, even though he is doing just that.
Men use this excuse when a women just isen’t quite his taste. He may think she’s cool and be willing to remain superficial friends (or even lovers) but she doesn’t knock his socks off. If a man uses the It’s not you its me breakup the way to handle it is to accept what he says.
Give him plenty of space and after a month or so has gone by he might actually miss you. It is at that point that you could touch base with him. If you want to stop the breakup you can let him know you still care and ask what if anything you did to contribute to things going wrong.
If he is willing to talk you after a month or so has passed, you might get the real scoop on why he dropped you at that point. If he missed you and you seem receptive to understanding what you may have done wrong to drive him away, you could have a good chance of reversing the breaking and getting him back.
The I am too busy breakup excuse
When he says he is too busy what he means is that he just isen’t into you enough to take time out to see you. If he liked you that much, he would find time to fit you into his busy schedule. Time would appear. He would make time. If he met a sexy super model at a bar on Friday night, trust me he would have time to exchange numbers and make time to date her.
If he says he is too busy he really can’t see your worth. If someone doesn’t want to spend time with you or can barely bring himself to, then why in the world would you spend time with him? Right. The easy solution is to just accept his busy excuse and say “Next”. If you want to stop the breakup though, there are a few ways to handle the busy excuse.
Sometimes these busy excuses are just crud tests. He wants to see if you respect his schedule. If you pester a guy too much or don’t respect his personal schedule or career goals, he might decide to get pissed and get busy. Then, when you continue to bother him when he is busy, he can feel like you don’t respect him or what he says.
If you want to stop the breakup then it is best to accept the busy excuse and leave him alone. Become the feminine energy and respect what he says. If he misses you, then he will contact you. If you continue to stay cool and not push yourself on him, he may start coming back. He’ll be thinking, she was was pressuring me and all over my case, now she is acting cool and respecting my schedule and my terms. He may even start to fall for you again.
The we should date other people excuse
This means that something has clicked in his mind that you are not girlfriend material. He usually uses this excuse after he has been sleeping with you but has arrived at a decision that he does not wish to be exclusive. His we should date other people excuse often gets blurted out right about the time that you are thinking, we should become exclusive.
We should date with people is his opting out of becoming your boyfriend. He still enjoys sleeping with you and spending time with you, but in his mind you may not be the one for him. He is not emotionally compelled to hijack himself out of the singles market yet. He thinks you are sexy enough to sleep with but doesn’t want the obligations of being your boyfriend.
The we should see other people is pretty much his I want my cake and eat it plea. Most women will opt out at this point, thinking, I want a monogamous relationship and nothing else will do. The problem is, he’s telling you he won’t be monogamous when he gives you this excuse. So your only choice is to opt out, or continue to be with someone in a sharing or harem situation.
If you want to stop the breakup it is going to be a tricky road and a tough emotional ride. I would not give him an ultimatum in this situation. Instead, go along with his seeing other people attitude and act like you don’t care. Meanwhile, let the “cake” he eats from you become inexplicably scarce. In other words, go along with his plan but because almost completely unavailable.
Your hope here is that his escapades don’t pan out to be all that he expected, and he misses spending time with you. Since you didn’t make a big drama about his shenanigans his attraction will increase for you. He’ll be thinking, why isen’t she freaking out about me seeing other people and crying at my feet? His curiosity will grow and eventually he will be back to wanting to spend time with you.
If a guy says he wants to see other people then accept what he says and put him on a starvation diet so that he misses you and craves you again.
The you are too good for me break up excuse
If he says you are too good for him this is just a weird excuse. It’s plain weird. He’s saying he puts about zero stock in the relationship working. This is one breakup excuse you should probably break up with. Don’t try to stop it. Most men think they have a higher market value than they do. So if he thinks he is such a bad news individual that you’re too good for him, let him go. He’s writing you off at the get go and also feeling sorry for himself, which both spell loser.
Save yourself the trouble trying to fix a broken guy because the next lady who comes along after you is usually the one who benefits from all your hard work to fix him up.
Save that breakup and stop him from breaking up with you
Remember that when you hear that breakup excuse pour out of his mouth, there may still be hope. Sometimes it is just a way for him to say that he isen’t happy with the way you are acting towards him. If you stop and really listen to as well as respect what he says, you may be able to stop the breakup. It’s time to put down the masculine energy you have and show your more feminine energy side. This is the best hope for saving your relationship if he is threatening a breakup. No matter how bad you want to get clingy as he pulls away, don’t. Show him you can both listen to his words and control your emotions.
You need to back off, go on with your own life, and stop texting and smothering him. Give him space and respect what he asks you to do. If you are kind and also willing and able to curtail some of the behaviors that may be hurting the relationship, you may be able to save things. Remember that men break up less often than women. They do get attached. So if you can respect what he wants and work on some of the behaviors you exhibited that damaged the relationship you may just be able to stop the breakup.
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