How your obsessive texting makes him just not that into you

If you always text your boyfriend or romantic interest it might actually be working against you. Here is why. The more you text him, the less he has to text you. Then, he gets used to having to never text you. You are initiating contact so much that he doesn’t have to bother to initiate contact with you. The more he understands that you like him so much that you can’t go for more than a few days without texting him, the less he has to text you. He (or she) is not clueless. He knows that all he has to do is wait you out and after a short period of time and you’ll undoubtedly cave and text him to say hi.

As soon as he knows you’ll initiate contact (if he doesn’t), he stops his effort to make contact. And you slowly slip into a whole new category of a relationship. The category called doormat, where he doesn’t have to work at it or bother to contact you. You contact him. You become the man. Your relationship becomes reversed and backwards. If only you hadn’t texted him so much you think. And when you think that, rest assured you were probably right. You should not have texted him as much.

You might ask yourself, why play games and be a game player. If I want to text him daily and say hi because I care then I should because that’s how I honestly feel. We all know you feel like that. So then to not text is that a game and pretending you don’t care when you really do? No it is not a game and I will tell you why. Because you don’t have to text him daily to tell him you care as he surely already knows it. So you care, you care, but repetitively texting him to tell him or show him you care is redundant, smothering and boring to him. You don’t always have to let a person know what is on your mind. Texting too much is like thinking out loud and it becomes a turn off to a man.

Not only is constant texting smothering, it is bad for your communication. The resting level of the relationship will change as a consequence of the constant contact and the power will shift into his favor. He doesn’t even have to lift a finger to call or text you in order to hear from you. You are officially becoming a doormat girlfriend that he never has to contact instead of a girlfriend that he has to contact and make plans with in order to see.

If you back off of your obsessive texting then you’ll create a little text vacuum and he’ll notice. He’ll fill in the space and start to wonder what you are up to. He’ll either get curious and make contact to see you or he won’t. But whatever you do, don’t hand him the opportunity to be lazy with you and look at you as a doormat backup girl who is always there at his door while he goes doing lord knows what. Stop obsessive texting because it makes his job way too easy and helps him to think of you as a doormat.

Don’t text him constantly and you won’t be a doormat. It’s one thing if a man treats you like a doormat, yet another if you hand him the rights to treat you like a doormat on a silver text message platter. Don’t give free handouts because people will like them and people will be naturally inclined to take advantage. It’s like free food at work. Why get up and go out and buy lunch if the free food is sitting there. Think of your text messages to him as food and don’t over text-stuff him on it. If you keep obsessively texting he will view it all as noise and go find someone that texts him higher value, lower volume text message content. He’ll take the free food when its convenient but places a higher value on the fancy restaurant. He’ll take the doormat girl who texts him all the time when its convenient but place a higher value on the woman who he can never seem to get in touch with.


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One Response to How your obsessive texting makes him just not that into you

  1. Pinkie says:

    Where is the facebook like link ?

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