If you want to be a wonderful girl who men want to be around, then try to develop some stellar personality traits and avoid negative traits that will only drive him away. Men fall in love with women that make them feel really good about themselves. Women wanting to change him, mold him, or control him, won’t get as far as women who support their man and look up to him. That being said, you don’t want to be a pushover and tolerate poor treatment from a man just because you think being nice is going to get you somewhere. Being nice to a jerk won’t get you what you want. Deliver your best behavior and time and energy to the men that treat you with respect and deserve to be in your inner circle.
Furthermore, if a man you are dating is acting like a pig and his behavior literally brings out these traits in you then take a big step back. You don’t want how he acts, to turn you into a monster. If you see these traits rearing their ugly head then take a look at your behavior and try to clean it up. If you man is inspiring this behavior by being a player, a liar, or being evasive, you may want to reconsider dating him. Sometimes negative traits are just part of your personality and you need to work on becoming a more positive endearing woman. Sometimes though, the negative traits get brought out by the fact that a man isn’t treating you right. In this case, you may want to jettison the man.
Being negative around him
Being negative around your man is not going to get you far. In fact, the guy is going to thank his lucky stars that he didn’t get more involved with you. You don’t want to blacklist a guy just because of a small conflict or misunderstanding. If you are negative about him or treat him like he is some kind of jerk her is not going to want to be around you. If you notice that your man is backing off or shying away, do an introspection on how you are behaving. Sure he might have found a better opportunity and that’s out of your control. Yet it’s also possible that you are acting in such a way that he is repulsed by you. Don’t drive him away with your negativity.
Giving him unsolicited advice
Giving unsolicited advice to your man is never going to go over that well. Let’s say you were a single mom and he had no children. Would you really want to listen to his unsolicited advice or criticism about how you handle your own kids? This is just an example but you have to consider what unsolicited, critical advice would do to you. It would irk you, right? Well turn this around and he is going to feel the same way. If you give him advice like he doesn’t know what he is doing, he won’t like it. He managed to live his life up until now without your input, so he sure as heck will survive without your unsolicited advice going forward.
If he asks for you input, that is a different story. Then, he is opening the door up to wanting to know what you think about things. That’s having a two-way conversation, where he is open to listening. This, is desirable. Shoving your unsolicited advice down his throat when he didn’t want it in the first place, is heavily undesirable.
Acting completely bitter
Acting completely rancid is going to really turn him off. If you are doing this on text message you should stop. If you write him texts like why don’t you ever write me first, why are you ignoring me, or if you make snide remarks like why should i do that, you don’t even contact me, etc, it’s not going to warm him up to you. Especially where text messages are concerned you should pass all your text messages through a last-minute thought process before you press the send message. Think about the tone of the message and think about how it’s really going to go over with him. Nobody wants to get obnoxious text messages all the time. If you are upset with him, just zip if for a while. Sending a stream of unsightly texts is only going to make you look horrible, and in his mind it will justify his ignoring you or blowing you off. Some things are left unsaid, particularly when it comes to text message. A rude message to him may do more harm than good.
What man wants to sit around and listen to a woman who whines all the time? If all you can do is whine and complain, you need to find better things to do. This sounds contrite but you could go volunteer, shop with mom, do something positive, or just be productive around your house. Wrench yourself away from complaining that he never calls you, asks you out, initiates, or texts you back. Whining will get you nowhere. Getting on with your life and getting positive things going on with your life will show him that your life runs without depending on his existence. A man loves a woman who has a full life and who he has to make an effort to get himself squeezed into her exciting life. Whining and complaining about what he is doing wrong, doing, not doing, and so forth, is going to get you nowhere.
Men move on because they want to be around someone who makes them feel good about themselves. Always keep this in mind. However, you need to have solid standards and boundaries so you can walk away from a man who is not treating you right. There is a difference between being sweet and gentle with a man who cares about you, and being sweet and gentle, with a man who is playing you and seeing other women on the sly. If you man throws acid into you face, are you really going to succeed in acting sweet and gentle? A man will stay with a woman that makes him feel good and has self-respect too. This means you have to be a sweetheart, but at the same time be willing to walk away from poor treatment. If anything is going to bring out and breed these negative behaviors, it’s a guy that is playing you.
If you are negative, whining, complaining, bossy and generally shoving your unwarranted opinion on him and crowding him, it is only going to drive him away. Get busy with your own life and try to do productive things that nurture your beautiful personality and make you into a happy and wholesome person with little to complain about. Count your blessings. Always work on bettering your personality and if you exhibit negative traits then they need work. Being the best person you can be is going to definitely help you get the guy you want. Men love women who can stay calm, reason, and remain polite and well-behaved without getting ruffled and losing it.
Finally, if you see negative traits bubbling up to the surface, take a long hard look at how he is treating you. Having a shining personality is nearly impossible if you are with a guy that is lying to you, cheating on you, being evasive, breaking plans, acting like a flake, and blowing you off. In these cases you might want to consider dating him. If he is bringing out your worst traits it’s the sign of a potentially toxic relationship.
A man should bring out the best in you and make you feel good about yourself. This in turn, makes you be on best behavior and wanting to please him. He should be into you. Positive energy and a good connection are the ingredients for him to fall in love and want to be around you all the time. Men want to be with a woman who is fun to be with and can enjoy life with him. He wants to be inspired by a woman not taken down or torn apart by a woman. If he is only luke warm on you or passing the time with you, you aren’t going to have that positive vibe that makes him fall in love. He needs to be respectful and kind himself. If this isn’t happening, you may want to ditch the man, right along with the negative traits he is inspiring in you.
If you are sending him a dozen texts a day ragging on him, go to the top of this article and read again. You are better off leaving a man than allowing yourself to become a downer of a person for him to be around. You are better off taking a big step back from him while keeping your personality in track, than staying in the fighting ring and devolving down to mud-slinging. A negative down-spiral of poor personality traits and behaviors is going to wreck any relation. Don’t let yourself sink into the abyss because you will totally lose sight of your goal which is to make him fall in love with you and treat you well.