It’s a first date, or early in your relation with Mr hot. Your goal? To make a good impression on him of course! Get a great outfit on, twinkly eyes, don your bubbly personality and be great company – because men want that type of girl on a first date. Now, wait just a second because don’t forget that you have to carry on a great conversation with him too. Here are some tips to keep him entranced, rather than running for the hills.
Don’t be too high maintenance
Even if your guy is well to do, a high maintenance woman is going to be a tough sell. The last thing you want to do is come off as a gold digger. Five star multi-course meals are over the top. Don’t make a guy feel like there is a price tag on your head for your company. Likewise, you don’t want to be so dressed up that you look out of control high maintenance.
Try the one-off dress-code, where you counter balance anything super fancy with an opposite that is more casual. For example, if you are wearing pumps, wear very little makeup. planning to wear a sexy dress? Couple it with low-key sandals. You dig lots of makeup? Tone it down with cute casual jeans and top. The idea is to look like your gorgeous sexy self and display your best features, while at the same time not looking like a high maintenance Barbie.
Don’t grill him
Never grill your date early in the relation. Giving your man the third-degree will just make him squirm! Oh was he a former pro baseball player? Don’t squeeze the truth out of him that he rode on a bus making minimum wage in the minors and never did make it to the big leagues. You get the idea.
Every man wants to seem like a success story but the odds are high that he’s only human just like you. Don’t pull teeth and give him the pedigree grilling or dig deep to uncover his successes or failures. Men really hate getting the third degree. If it starts to feel like some sort of background check or interrogation, he will be running back to the cell block as fast as he can. Running from the police … which is you if you grill him on that date!
Don’t reveal gory details
Don’t review gory deep details about your latest medications, diseases, dysfunctional family members, or recent financial crisis. Your date does not need to know all these things too early on. Sure, he will find out your story but you don’t have to bore him by presenting it to him on a silver platter. Leave out your medical problems, personal lawsuits, and everything rotten your mother ever did to you. Even talking about silly and useless things like whats funny on the menu or doing goofy impressions, is going to go over better that the grilling. Remember that your man is there with you to get a break from life, to enjoy himself and just feel good. The better he feels around you, the more he will want to spend more time around you.
Keep the ex out of it
It is almost impossible to keep the ex girlfriends and boyfriends out of the conversation. But try. One thing is that you probably should not trash talk your ex around him. He might be interested in why it didn’t work out, but save that for when you’ve been dating him a little longer. Try not to say bad things about your exboyfriend around him because it will only make you look nasty and spiteful. Instead, just say it didn’t work out or that you weren’t a good match in so far as personality. Keep it a little vague. If he does dig about your past, make sure to take responsibility for your part in any breakups.
If you got dumped by your ex and he is asking questions about what happened, make light of it. Say something like, I didn’t pay as much attention to the relation as a should have, and he met someone else during the time. It was disappointing yet I learned something from it which is that I should have made my man more of a priority. Your new guy doesn’t want to think that you aren’t able to own up to your own responsiblity in a breakup. If you are able to keep things on a lighter level, and accept full responsibility for your past breakups, men will think you are a woman who is in emotional control of your life and that is very attractive.
Don’t get too sexy
Don’t let conversations go into the gutter with your new man. It really sets a bad precedent and it will lead him to objectify you from a physical standpoint. This isn’t good. Being playful and sexy, and even being a bit of a flirt can make spending time with you both fun and intriguing for him. But telling him about naughty things that really are not G rated is inappropriate and leads to him thinking of you as a good time girl. Don’t talk too physical or get too physical early on. If you need a benchmark for when it is OK to get physical, maybe you should wait at least until you have seen where he lives at, or have met and hung out with some of his friends.
Don’t act desperate for a husband
It’s good to be honest about what you want out of relations, but it’s not something you are going to want to club him over he head with. Once is all that is needed to let him know you have a desire to get married and have children one day. He will get the message loud and clear with a simple subtle hint. If you pound that notion into the ground however, you may just frighten him away. The poor guy is just on a date and trying to get to know you after all. He needs to feel that there is a special connection between the two of you, and not just some need for you to plug the nearest available guy into your life.
Once you get to know him and go through a few life experiences with him, you can open up about all of your hopes and dreams. Until then, take your time revealing yourself. It’s just a date after all. The goal is to be enjoyable company and leave him wanting more. If he follows up after your dates and wants to see you again, you know that you are going a great job so just relax and have fun. Enjoy life on that date and leave your high expectations about the future of your relationship at the door!