Rock solid relationship and dating tip


Are you finding yourself in flimsy relationships that quickly fall apart after just a few months of dating? Such is the life of dating these days, especially online dating.  People meet quickly then fall into an over-night romance. But after some time spent together one or the other person may find faults.  They may discover that they are just not be interested enough in moving the relationship forward so they move on to someone new instead.

If you’ve ever dated a man that spent time with you but then quickly moved on then you may have been hurt by this.  You might feel expendable or like a part that can just be interchanged for another woman.  Feeling that someone cared then getting physical with them, then watching him move on without a scratch really bites. But the sad fact is that he probably did the right thing in moving on quickly when he found he just wasn’t interested in you enough.  It’s ruthless but once he discovered he wasn’t interested enough he really did you a favor in leaving you alone and not stringing you along or wasting your time.

Don’t spend time or text message with someone who doesn’t want the same thing as you do

Here is the biggest relationship tip you could ever get in your life.  You should learn this axiom from the man who left you and moved on after just a couple of months.  Don’t spend time with someone who doesn’t want the same thing you do. If you really do want a committed, long term relationship then don’t spend time with a man who doesn’t want that very same thing with you.  The sooner you opt out of a man not interested enough, the better.

I get all dozens of emails on topics such as why won’t he text back, he blows off my texts, he never responds to texts, he flakes out on dates and he is continuing to see other people or why does he keep an active online dating profile.  And the emails have to do with women wanting to know what tricks, techniques or games that a woman (or man) can do to increase interested level, make someone jealous, or make them want to become more serious about a relationship.

The fact of the matter is that people date for a while and if one decides that they aren’t interested in partnering with you then they will likely never create a partnership with you. You won’t get anywhere at all with a person who isen’t interested.  You can ask yourself over and over what you may have done wrong to make them not interested but if they aren’t interested they aren’t.  period.  Analyzing isen’t going to make them interested although it could help you to operate your next liason more succesfully.

People who are interested in one another make an effort and people are aren’t interested don’t

People who are interested in one another make an effort. They don’t have to force it and they don’t have to strong arm or convince the other person to get that effort. On the most basic level, if someone likes you then there is going to be talking, taking turns in communicating and contact, and interest in both sides to resolve any conflicts.  Two people who are both interested are capable to come to the simplest of agreements.  Two people who aren’t equally interested can’t agree on a damn thing.

If you have a guy who won’t even text message you back, it is completely hopeless. You can come up with a certain amount of excuses for a man but after a while, the writing will be on the wall.  It’s true that some men don’t like to text nearly as much as women. They might text in the courting phase then settle quickly down into less communication. If your texting and communication styles are polar opposites, that’s one thing. But if this is the case you will still see other signs that a man is interested. He’ll call and keep plans and promises.  A man who is interested won’t be a flake.

If you can’t even communicate right then a relationship is not in the cards

If you are googling why won’t he text me back or why won’t he talk to me, then your relationship probably won’t work out. People who want to be in relationship talk to each other and they don’t wander off and pursue other women or men. If somebody cares, it is blatantly obvious. First make sure that you aren’t over doing it. If you are texting him fifty times a day then it’s really your problem not his. You’re too needy.  Make sure your expectations are sane.

If you’ve established that your communication patterns are within the range or normal and yet he has no interested in lifting a finger to return a text or phone call much less initiate one, move on. This is a clear sign the person isen’t interested in you. The hot and cold treatment is another sign of non-interest. If someone is hot then goes cold for weeks on end the interest level just isen’t there.  Hot and cold treatment comes from people who are interested in casual sex not a relationship.

Be clear that you want a committed long term relationship

Women are embarrassed to be clear on what they really want. They try to play it cool and act like they are interested in casual dating or friends with benefits. They especially do this to try and get with men who are out of their league.  They inherently know they can’t get these men to commit so they accept way less for just the chance to be with them at all.

All of this is a big mistake, especially during the child bearing and marriage years of life. Don’t waste time with a man who isen’t interested in what you are. Once you’ve established that you are showing normal communication patterns and that your expectations are within reason, if he isen’t reciprocating then move on. This will save so much time and heartache.

Particularly if you want a serious relationship or a family you shouldn’t waste time on a man who doesn’t wish for a rock solid relationship just like you do. Remember, that if you both don’t want the same thing, it won’t work out.

Going back to that example above where you were hurt because a man dated you then quickly moved on after a few months. Take a lesson from him and do the same exact thing. If you date someone and realize you just aren’t interested or more importantly it becomes clear to you that they aren’t interested in a committed, long term relationship, move on. Because if you stay around and date or sleep with a man who won’t commit in the beginning, the history is writing itself. Once he won’t commit to something more than casual sex, he likely never will.

           

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