Here are a few signs that he is not headed toward a real relationship with you. Things may be going pleasantly enough but if you get the following behavior from a guy it means he likely will not stick around long-term. This is going to be the type of guy you want to opt away from.
Even if you like him, opt away so that if he does come back later you can have a chance at a relationship and not the go nowhere thing he is doing with you now. Look out for the following because these behaviors tell you that its going nowhere. This is going to be harsh but because everyone texts so much, women can really miss and I mean totally miss the signs of a go nowhere relationship until its way too late to fix things. Once the bad behavior pattern is set, the history writes itself. It’s next to impossible to make a relationship that has a pattern of being just benefits, become one that is meaningful.
Texting but never calling
If you find yourself living on text message, this is the sign of a going nowhere gig. When a guy really likes a girl he is going to call her and want to hear her voice. In addition to that he is going to text her pretty regularly. Texting is an easy way to communicate but when it comes to relationships it is also an easy way to avoid communication. He can text to keep your relationship hanging by a thread. A few words here and there, and you are hanging like a dumdum puppet onto every word.
He is never on time and unreliable
If your guy makes and breaks casual plans as easily as other people wave hello to one another in the street, its doomed. A guy that doesn’t care will find reasons to blow you off. He will be late. He will act like a flake. He will blame it on the busy. He will be disorganized and not on a schedule when it comes to seeing you. This is a guy that wants to hang around when he wants to and cares little for your life or your time. Men value their time and especially on the weekend nights they tend to know what they are doing, you’re likely the only one that is in the dark about what he is up to. He knows who he is, where he is, and where his is going and with whom.
An ex girlfriend lurking
An ex still in the picture could pose a problem. You would be surprised how many guys ooze outside their actual relationship to rear their heads up into the dating world and your life, without really knowing much less thinking about what they are doing. This can be because they got into a fight with their girlfriend and so they are retaliating by looking around. Especially if he is still whining, complaining, or talking about his ex-girlfriend, he is just not that into you. His head is stuck on other things and issues. In fact, consider him semi-amputed and running around without his head temporarily.
Hiding the friends
If time marches on but you have never met his friends you are going nowhere and nowhere fast. Trust me that when a man likes you and is actually interested he will bring you around where he lives, around his friends, and around his life. The first few months are excusable but beyond that you don’t live in a bubble, unless of course, he wants you to. If the bubble is you and him, and only one of your houses, this is a really bad sign. Don’t kid yourself. Men who like you will show you their place and bring you around their people.
If affection is limited to doing certain acts together, this could be a problem. When you really like someone you have to touch them and want to spend time with them. For example if you do get intimate you stay there to be around one another for as long as possible, you don’t run home or get a sudden itch. A guy who really likes you will park it and vegetate with you, to watch a movie or do mundane things. He wants to be around you and shows you affection in general not just when he is getting some action. You can tell he cares with the way he talks and the way he acts. A man that likes you will follow up after dates and not just leave you wondering what happened and where he went.
The future does not exist
Future plans don’t exist when you are going nowhere. He is not talking about fun places to go, things to do, or people to meet. He is not making any plans. He is taking it day by day only. He might talk about those things in the early initial dating, but as time goes on he no longer does, because it is going nowhere. In fact, there is a weird vibe you can catch on to when its going nowhere. It’s sort of a gradual tune-out that you will feel, when it comes to your life. It’s that he just isn’t that interested in your health, safety, happiness, life, or future. He also doesn’t share real foibles with you and everything is kept at this early dating superficial level even though you already have been hanging out for a while.
Men who aren’t interested in you are incredibly inconsiderate. He might be a selfish person in general but honestly, if he is not interested in a relationship he will be even more inconsiderate than any sort of normal or acceptable inconsiderate levels. It’s not about him buying or not buying you flowers. It’s about him keeping plans with you, making plans with you, asking about you, and just being pretty nice in general. A man who is going nowhere with you is only considerate when he is getting what he wants when he wants it. Outside of his needs, agenda, and availability, he really doesn’t care about you. You can see this for example when he doesn’t acknowledge your birthday, blows you off for long periods of time leaving you wondering, and doesn’t have concerns about your plans whatsoever. If he leaves you sitting home on a Friday or Saturday night because he has other opportunities and cool people to see, he won’t give you a second thought. He figures, she can fend for herself.
Doesn’t care about what you love
If you are going nowhere he just won’t show signs of caring about the people you love. For example if you have kids he will just bubble them out of the picture and never bring them up or change the subject. He just doesn’t ask questions about family and friends. Do you know why? Because he does not care about your family or your friends. He just cares about what he is doing at that time and if you fit into his plans. Everything revolves around his life. If you break down in your car and your engine explodes into an inferno and you text him, you won’t get a response or a phone call. In fact, he’ll just figure oh well, she’s out for a while and go merrily on about his business of making alternate plans. He doesn’t even care about … your car.
Days of meaning to you, mean nothing to him
Important dates don’t mean a thing to him if he has no plans to get serious. He won’t remember your birth sign, won’t remember your birthday, won’t know your kids names, won’t know your middle name. Holidays will come and go and you’ll be lucky if you get a Merry Xmas text that he sent to 10 other recipients. A guy going nowhere with you will never ask you out on your birthday or get you something on Valentine’s day. In fact, he will literally recede into the shadows, or drop off the face of the earth, or become super busy. If you were to invite him to your high school reunion he definitely would not go. He won’t remember how long you’ve known each other and he’ll ask you questions that you’ve already answered many times. He may even forget how many kids you have, as an example. He just won’t mentally save all the little tidbits and things you tell him since its all just words in the wind on the way to him getting something he wants. It’s like you’re talking at him, not with him. You’ll get that feeling that everything is rolling off. You will also build resentment when he doesn’t remember your birthday or something like that. You could tell him on Friday your birthday is on Monday, and by the time the weekend passes he will have forgotten your birthday exists and not even send you so much as a text that day. When you chide him later he will say, I didn’t know when your birthday was! because he was not registering a day of meaning to you. If you are Jewish and you’ve told him what your religion is a couple times, he’ll ask you why you don’t have a Christmas tree. Those are just some examples.
He goes radio silent on you
This is the guy that goes radio silent on you when it suits him. He gets another girl, gets distracted, blows you off, or just doesn’t answer your texts like he disappeared off the face of the Earth. He’ll say he hasn’t been online when you can see he is logged into Facebook! He’ll comment on other people’s and women’s photos during periods of time where he claims to be incredibly busy. He isn’t too busy to drool over a different ladies photos that are posted and comment on them, but yet its been days if not weeks and he hasn’t brought himself to text you.
The radio silent guy is actually doing something hostile. What he is saying is, that he isn’t going to lift a finger. You are going to be doing the work contacting him. Basically, a guy that doesn’t care about a relationship with you has no problem letting you become the man in the relationship and the one who is contacting him and asking him for plans. Guys who are excited about you stay in the driver’s seat. They don’t jump out of the moving car as you continue to drive it down the road pretending he is passenger. He might hop in and hop out periodically but he is definitely not staying for the duration. You will definitely see this and feel this when a relationship is going nowhere. He will literally drop out on you and this is often because he is with other people or involved with someone else. He’ll keep seeing you as long as you don’t press him. But as soon as you get fed up, he’ll just act all innocent and then just be gone because the gig is up. This is the guy who strings you along for variety, convenience and an ego boost, but does not genuinely care about you. Radio silence when it comes to you on Facebook, while he is actively communicating with others and commenting etc, is a clear sign that you aren’t on his mind. Radio silence is also a way that he tells you his is not interested and that he hopes you will actually pick up on so he doesn’t have to say it outright or have uncomfortable conversationg about his obvious intentions of going nowhere with you.
Another example of radio silent is that he goes out-of-town or to visit family or on vacation, and you literally never hear from him the whole time. It’s just unusual. You know his phone is still glued at his hip and he actually has to try his hardest not to butt-dial you, but instead you hear nothing from him. Radio silent guys rarely initiate although they will respond whenever they feel like it. It can be subtle but if a guy is not going to get serious with you and you actually look for signs rather than excuse his behavior and rationalize it, you will get a much clearer picture of reality and can act accordingly. Radio silent guys are usually hoping that you will eventually understand that they aren’t going to ever be or ever become, your boyfriend. You’re just a woman he sees every now and then, and who texts hims.