Women are most attracted to a man that is handsome in her eyes, a little bit of a challenge, yet at the same time sweet to her. If your girlfriend is really into you then you have the red light to text her and she will most likely enjoy your texts. But like all things good, some times too much of a good thing is, well, too much. Here are some pitfalls, insights and warning signs that you might be texting your girlfriend too much. If she is becoming indifferent to your texts you may be over doing it. It may be time to back down and text her less in order to keep her craving your attention.
Don’t send her regular good mornings and goodnights
Girls are fickle and while they want you to be infatuated with them, they also want you to be out of their league and beyond their reach. That little question mark in their mind when you leave them guessing creates strong chemistry and attraction. In other words, your girlfriend needs to feel challenged by you. Women want what they can’t have sometimes. That desire is what keeps the chemistry and tension growing stronger and igniting between the two. Therefore, you always want to remain just a little out of her reach.
If you text your girlfriend too much or every single day, you become a little too predictable and available. The strength of your texts dampen and they become less special to her. They key to texting her the right amount is to do the initiating, but always text her just a teensy bit less than she texts you. You want her reading over your texts at night to recall what you said, not deleting them all like garbage or spam in her inbox. You want her to love your texts and look forward to getting one from you. To make sure this happens, don’t send her too many. Instead, make each one count.
If she claims she was too busy then text her a lot less
One warning sign that you are texting her too much, is that your texts aren’t getting responded to. If your texts lose their charm or there are too many coming to her phone then she’ll start to manage you down. She’ll be busy and she won’t always respond back to your texts.
With our cell phones glued to our bodies it is literally hard not to respond to a text! You have to try not to pocket dial or pocket text your friends these days. Certainly there are times when she’s driving and can’t text but most of the time your girlfriend can text you back and will text back if she is extremely attracted to you. If you sense her cooling off then chances are your gut instinct is right and you should back off, create some space, and text her less. Make her work a little bit harder again for your attention.
If your girlfriend is so busy that there is a long turn around time to hear back from her, or she only answers some of your texts but not all of them, then you are texting her to death. Stop texting messaging and make her do some work in order to talk to you. Become a little less available to her.
Trust me that if a girl is really smitten with you, then getting a text message from you will be as good as Sees chocolate and even if she is in a business meeting at work she will rush into the ladies room to text you back at first opportunity. You’ll be able to tell by her excited and rapid responses if a girl is receiving your text messages well. She won’t be able to hide her excitement to hear from you. Every text message you send her will make her day.
Starve her just a little to keep her interested and responsive when you do text
While you don’t want to play games with a girl you are with because you really might hurt her, you do want to keep things exciting and a tad unpredictable between the two of you. Thus, constant sappy texts are going to annoy her. She may even start to view you as needy and obviously you don’t want that. Don’t get all mushy on text message to the point where you come off as needy. Don’t give her this idea that she can take you for granted.
If your girlfriend is slow to respond to your texts or not responding to all of them with excitement, then you are definitely sending her too many texts. You need to take your focus off of your girlfriend and quit texting her so much! Remember, that each text to her should come as a tasty little morsel that she jumps on and can’t help but respond to. The less you text her the better the texts you send will be in her eyes.
If a girl really likes you she will save all your text messages in her inbox and read them over several times. So don’t flood her with messages. Think of every message as something she might save and re-read later.
Blowing hot and cold
The reason girls fall for the bad boys is that they blow hot and cold. Unpredictable behavior can turn up the heat in a relationship. Bad boys accomplish this because they act interested and give her attention, and then they drop off the map. Then, when they contact her again the girl goes from feeling rejected to feeling accepted and she becomes ecstatic over all again. That’s how a woman’s reaction to a man work sometimes. They want a challenge. Unpredictability and excitement make the relationship more interesting.
It’s not to say you should play too many games with a woman or act disrespectfully. Try to temper your texting habits to actually make her more excited than upset. When you do text her then blow hot and be totally sweet and into her. Alternate that with leaving her alone in her own juices so that she doesn’t come to expect your texts as a given. That way, when they do come she will relish them. It’s a little bit of a bad boy maneuver, but not taken to the extreme.
Don’t blow hot and cold just to be mean to her. Do alternate from warm and cool I guess you could say. A little spontenaiety and unpredictability to your texting will keep her on her toes and keep her mentally interested in you.
Create chemistry with unpredictability
Some times too much of a good thing, isn’t good for the relationship. Whether its 2-3 texts a day, or 10-15 texts a day, you don’t want to establish a predictable pattern of texting. Always be sure to mix it up a little bit.
One way to mix it up is to intersperse initiating contact with not initiating contact. When she texts you, don’t always text back if there is no reason to. Then later, out of the blue, text her. If you mix up your text patterns she’ll always be perked up when you do finally text her. Keep her guessing.
Sometimes when you banter back and forth with each other on text, let her send the last message and then just go on about your business. In other words, don’t always be the last one talking (or in this case the last one sending a text) in a conversation. Every once in a while you can leaving her hanging in anticipation. Get back to her later when she doesn’t expects it. If you are busy just let her know and keep her waiting in anticipation to hear from you.
Don’t text your girlfriend every day because in all honesty text messaging shouldn’t be the primary way you communicate with her. Texting should be another way to talk to her but certainly not the only way. If you start a habit of only texting and never calling her she will get upset. Don’t be surprised if you hear about it in a multi-text ranting message from her when she finally blows her cool on you. Girls want phone calls and texts should just be a sporadic addition to phone calls not a replacement for them. Mix up phone calls and texting so she never really knows what to expect and is always hoping to hear from you.
Finding that perfect number of texts
If she is “pouncing” on your texts which is to say that she is responding quickly, happily and playfully to all the texts you send to her, then you can assume that your pattern of texting is a good one. Sometimes you respond quickly to her text messages, sometimes you don’t. Sometimes you initiate, sometimes you don’t. Sometimes you text her every day, sometimes you go for a few days without texting her at all. If she texts you mix it up and call her back later instead of texting. Always mix it up a little to keep her interest level in you as high as possible.
It’s not games really it just keeps the relationship playful and interesting. A girl wants a boyfriend who is sweet and reliable, mixed up with a little bit of bad boy behavior to keep her brain calculating and thinking.
Earning her loyalty while at the same time continuing to let sparks fly throughout your relationship is the challenge. By maintaining your independence and a hint of unpredictability you’ll have a girlfriend who is really into you and not taking you for granted.
Save it for in person
If you find yourself having to say something on text that is long winded and influxes a dozen waiting texts into her inbox then don’t text. Keep texting down to a minimum and sporadic. Always get right to the point and don’t do small talk with her. Let her do that with her girlfriends. That way, you are saving the good stuff for when you actually see one another.
If you really like a girl don’t just manage her on text message. Make sure to call her. Call her sporadically to keep her on her toes but do use the phone. Without phone calls she will begin to feel like she is not important to you. Don’t just text her, its mean and she will eventually resent it.
Don’t create a stalker girlfriend
If you find yourself only communicating with a girl on text message you may not like her as much as you think. If you really liked her for real, you would pick up the phone and call her. Make sure you let a girl know where you stand, even if it means letting her go or becoming just friends.
If you use a girl for intimate encounters and only text her then you are setting yourself up to have a text stalker on your hands in no time at all. Plus, its very bad karma to treat a girl wrong and take advantage of her.
Remember that relationships that have lots of text messages will continue to have lots of text messages. Don’t get caught in the text trap. It could start out as dozens of texts and pretty soon you will realize you have created a monster girlfriend who is texting you 900 times a month. So, be careful what you wish for and what you allow for on text. If you send her 50 texts one night, expect payback of 50 texts in your inbox too.
The number of texts she sends to you tends to escalate and increase over time if you allow it to. If you keep texting to a minimum it’s actually safer for the long term health of your relationship. It decreases the probability that she will start to text you too much.
Don’t ever let her in on the concept that she can constantly text you or you might regret it. She will never leave you alone. Engaging her in long winded text conversations will only fuel her texting fire in the long run. For example, if she starts to complain on text message tell her that its too much and you’ll talk on the phone or in person later about it. Don’t engage in long winded text rants with her because it essentially teaches her that its ok for her to do it. Be sure to nip too much texting in the bud by refusing to engage in long text conversations.
Always remain in control of the situation and guide her with the appropriate behavior. Teach her that you will only tolerate her texting you a reasonable amount and that anything more than that will not be acceptable. You have to set the right texting example or you may regret it later. Don’t let texting and the communicating on the internet replace face to face conversation and voice conversations on the phone. The best policy is to keep text as an infrequent form of communication only. That way you will never enable a text stalker girlfriend.