Have you ever wondered why he fizzled on you after the first date? Here is the explanation I got from one man, who met over forty women through online dating on the internet. You’ll find out what the main reason he stated was for the blow off, and precisely how he executed the blow off. He said out of some forty women he met that there were only three he would have considered asking out again. One of them did not want to date him, and the remaining two it just never took off.
If you’re wondering why he never called after that first date, or trying to figure out what his texts mean after that initial first date, then read on because this may give you a bit of insight into how men think.
The #1 one reason that he didn’t call back was misrepresentation. You didn’t look anything like your picture
The number one reason that this man didn’t call women back after the first meet up was because he felt they misrepresented their information on the dating profile. Usually this had to do with weight or attractiveness. More often than not it was weight. He said many of the women who listed themselves as athletic and in shape were in fact a substantial 30-40 pounds heavier in person, than in their profile pictures. He said he was stunned at how creative women were in taking photos that craftily hid their size. Lying about the age was the next concern though not nearly an egregious misrepresentation in his opinion as what their size was.
His viewpoint on this was, why engineer these posed pictures that make you miraculously look like someone you aren’t? I’m going to find out anyways when I meet you so why mischaracterize yourself. Not only was this disappointing, it made him upset. He stated that if he could add back all of the money he spent on nice first dates with women who looked nothing like their profile photos, he’s have a thousand dollars back in his pocket.
What can you learn about this? The main thing to learn is that your date will resent feeling duped or tricked vis-a-vis your looks. Even though you posed yourself in the best light possible as does everyone, try to at least look somewhat like your pictures. Posting flattering yet honest pictures is important. You may get asked out less but at least when you do the whole looks thing probably won’t be an issue. Don’t post the thin version of you from a decade ago and characterize that as the current you.
The #1 way he would let her know he just wasn’t interested: never contact her
Most men will let a woman know that he isen’t interested in her by simply not calling her after the first meetup. She never gets a callback. If the women never texts or phones the man, then it ends right there. He just never contacts her.
The #2 way he would let her know he just wasn’t interested if she texts: let her know gently he’s pusuing other opportunities
In most cases however, he said that the woman contacted him by text to say thank you for the date. At that point, he felt it would be rude not to respond. So he would say your welcome but also text her back a message saying that he was going to continue to pursue other opportunities. Hopefully he stated, this would drop enough of a hint to her that he was not interested in dating her.
The #3 way he would let her know he just wasn’t interested if she texts: let her know with a more direct text message that he just is not interested in her
If she continued to text after that point, he would send a stronger, second text, letting her know that he was not interested and wishing her the best.
The #4 way he would let her know he just wasn’t interested if she continues to text is to threaten her and send a cease and desist type of text message
If she continued to text after that then he would send a third text back that was a stern threat with a legal tone to it. For example, I’ve told you I am not interested in you and you need to leave me alone or I will document your messages and take action if need be. He didn’t like to do this however felt that if a woman really wasn’t getting the message that he wasn’t interested it was most effective to give her a scare, which would have the desired effect of making her go away and stop contacting him.
What you can learn from all of this rejection
The first thing to learn from all of this rejection is that if you totally misrepresent yourself on an Internet dating profile your date will be miffed and will more than likely never call you or ask you out again. The odds of them being pleasantly surprised with your personality even though you weigh fifty pounds more than your stated weight is slim. Lying about height and age are secondary violations but not looking like your pictures reigned supreme as the number one reason for the blow off.
The next thing to learn from all of this rejection is that if you never hear from him then he just isen’t interested. If you thank him for the date and he tells you he’s going to pursue other opportunities then he just isen’t interested. If you text him and he lets you know that he is not interested, then believe him, he is not interested. If you continue to text him he’ll label you as a 51/50 or quasi-crazy person that can’t control her own behavior. Don’t bother to keep texting him, because he’s just not interested.