Addicted texters always think that they and they alone, have a problem. And they do, because they can’t stop texting. In many cases though, the addicted texter blames himself or herself completely for not being able to stop texting. The behavior of texting compulsively is their fault this is true, but the cause of the texting may well be the person they are involved with!
In this article we discuss three things your girlfriend or boyfriend might be doing that is actually causing your text obsession! Once you see the light you might want to consider leaving this relationship rather than chasing after it.
Cheaters
If you are dealing with a cheater or player, and like to text, this is a potent and deadly combination. His or her cheating antics is likely to turn you into a psycho texter. Yes, the texting will be your fault and you’ll wind up looking like the stalker, but rest assured your poor behavior is emanating from the fact that you’ve hooked up with a toxic cheat.
If your partner is a cheater you should end the relationship. If you stay in it, you are bound to become your own worst enemy. You’ll get into the intrigue, the spying, the questioning him or her, the over analyzing, and game playing. Pretty soon you’ll be following them around and sending 300 texts when you catch them in the act making you look like the psyco!
The second you are playing detective and calling numbers on his phone bill, reading his mails or sneaking a peek at his cell phone is the second you need to realize that you should opt out of this relationship. Honestly, so many readers that have texting problems are dealing with idiotic partners that cheat, lie, steal and betray them. Yes their texting is horrible harassment, but its the way they are coping with being with someone horrendous. Texting is a way of hanging on to a relationship thats mostly in your head but in reality no longer exists. The sooner you see that your partner may be at the root of your texting problem, the better.
Pathological liars
Pathologic liars can be charming, convincing and downright sexy. You might in the back of your minds doubt their tall tales but if you are mesmerized with the person you tend to overlook it. Oh, she lied about having gone to college because he was just trying to impress me and felt embarrassed. Oh, he told me that he didn’t know anybody at that number because he didn’t want to have to explain away his ex girlfriend. You know.
Once you are charmed by a liar, you’ll make excuses for their lies. Excuses that not even the liar could have ever thought up! Don’t minimize lying! It is so often part of an underlying mental problem. A liar will likely have hurt people, deceived people, and lost many friendships and relationships once unmasked. What you might think is a white liar may be a full blown thief. If he lied about borrowing some change out of your purse you don’t think he would borrow your credit card and use it?
The biggest thing is that people minimize and overlook lieing because they still like somebody. So instead of jettisoning the liar out of their life, they get more enmesshed with the liar. Forgiving the liar, making excuses about the liar, texting the liar, obsessing over the lies, torturing anyone who would listen about the liar, and investing so much wasted energy into a loser. Liars always turn out to have more problems than just the lies they spout. If they can’t be trusted they likely have a scattering of jobs, relationships, and even police records in their wake.
Assume that once you figure out he or she is a liar, there is alot more wrong than just the lies. Liars usually have lousy credit and like to engage in parasitic relationships where they take advantage of someones empathy, understanding and pure heart. If your lover lies to you and you send them 100 texts explaining how much they hurt you do you really think they care? Liars have no remorse. Their only remorse is that they were caught lying. Next time, they’ll learn to cover up better. Pathological liars don’t stop lying its who they are and they even believe their own web of lies.
Backstabbers
Run as fast as you can away from a backstabber. Don’t make up with a backstabber. Be cordial to such person if you must come in contact with them but in all other cases avoid, avoid, avoid. Not that you want someone else to get hurt, but thank your lucky stars when a backstabber finds another target. They will back stab someone, and hopefully it is not you.
Women and men tend to take backstabbers back. For example, you acuse him or her of cheating and they deny, deny, deny. Come to find out they were cheating after all and thats why you texted them 1000 times accusing them. Then when you find our you were right you send another 1000 vindication texts to pat yourself on the back. OK so you weren’t crazy after all but you sure are acting like it. Right or wrong, you are texting a backstabber! Get over the backstabber, don’t text them whatever you do.
After getting caught cheating your boyfriend or girlfriend unceremoniously drops contact with you and moves on like you never mattered. But weeks or months into it, when the cheating relation fizzles out, they are back at your doorstep. They are ready to talk about all the things you did wrong that led to their cheating. Forget it. Once a cheater always a cheater and coming back to talk means nothing.
If you are married to a cheater who regrets what they’ve done, the cheater will take real and concrete steps to make amends from counseling to cutting contact with the other person to coming clean. A backstabber must show serious remorse if you want to let that person back into your life. Relationships usually fall to their lowest level so if you’ve been back-stabbed once by this individual rest assured you will be back-stabbed again.
Think twice before texting a cheater, liar or backstabber
Think twice before obsessing over a cheater, liar or backstabber. If you have so much invested in a person you tend to throw good text after bad. You stay involved and may continue to communicate with someone that has seriously messed you around. Hoping they will change. Thinking that if you can love them enough or convince them enough or understand them enough it will help (it won’t). They will change, but only for someone that is totally unwilling to put up with their bullshizzle. So don’t put up with their bullshizzle. The best way to deal with a cheater, liar or backstabber is to have zero tolerance.
Toxic relationships
If you are in a relationship where you are becoming a snoop or obsessed with texting your partner, it may be time to rethink the relationship. Consider not only what they do, but what being with them does to you. If being with someone is turning you crazy and making you behave less than your best, they aren’t the right person. In a good relation you bring out the best in one another more than you bring out the worst.
Don’t let someone steal your soul and turn you into something you aren’t. If they lie, cheat, steal, apologize then lie, cheat, steal, apologize, then you text them like crazy and forgive them, it’s an addictive cycle. Get out of the addictive cycle and remove yourself from a relationship that is making you become the psycho. The minute you allow a woman or man to make you crazy, obsessed or depressed, is the minute you’ve lost your soul.
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