Why does ex, boyfriend, or girlfriend give silent treatment?


Are you on the receiving end of the silent treatment? Being the silent treatment victim can be so upsetting.  If you understand the laws of seduction the silent treatment can have a side effect that this person is cutting you off but it makes you want to talk to them even more and more.   The silent treatment can easily lead to a vicious cycle of their stone-walling you, and then you wind up acting unstable and pathetic in response.

If you get the silent treatment from your ex that you were accustomed to texting and talking to all the time it can feel like torture.  It is akin to withdrawal.  But withdraw you must because if you try to go after them with texts to get them to start talking to you, suddenly you become the pursuer and the stalker in the relationship! If you’re getting the silent treatment from them, the best response if to focus on your own life and disengage completely.  Don’t try to force them to tell you what is going on or why they are doing it because that just gives them control.

Is he or she giving you the text silent treatment?

The text message silent treatment is a very common form of relationship abuse. It is generally used by people who just can’s stand to be on the receiving end of your assertiveness. While not always the case, it can often be the case that the ex or current boyfriend or girlfriend has done something incredibly rude. But rather than apologize for said behavior, whether it be breaking plans or cheating or starting a fight, they get even meaner and apply the silent treatment to you!

What the silent treatment does is that it cuts you off from your abusive boyfriend, girlfriend or ex. It send you a very distinctive message that you are totally insignificant to the silent treatment giver. If your boyfriend, girlfriend or ex is giving you the silent treatment it means they are showing you in no uncertain terms how easy it is to live without you.   They act as though you do not exist and as though you are easily replaced which can make you feel more insecure than usual.

Why the silent treatment is another form emotional abuse

The silent treatment is mean. It is passive aggressive. It is used by people who are insecure and lack integrity and by those who have a weak sense of character. The only way the silent treatment is justified is if your ex boyfriend or girlfriend has made it clear that you are broken up. If they ask you to cease and desist all contact including text messages you must leave them alone and move on. The only way the silent treatment is justified is if they’ve communicated to you that they are through with the relationship. In that one case, to continue to harass them is just rude.

People who can’t keep up their end of relationship commitments often use the silent treatment when they’ve messed up. They cut off all dialogue with you and do not wish to be confronted or flagged on their own wrongdoings. It is their way of saying that they will only engage with you if the relationship is on their terms. It’s their way or the highway and when you do something that displeases them such as confront them on poor behavior, you will get met with stone-walling silence as punishment. Some narcissists can give the silent treatment in doses that extend to months, particularly if they are dating others simultaneously.

As a rule of thumb, if they care, they communicate

Always remember that someone that loes you and cares about the relationship will come around. People may need cooling off time after disagreements, but they are generally interested in repairing things with those they care about. If a narcissist gives you silence and only engages when you come crawling back accepting any lousy treatment such as cheating, lying or cancelled plans, its not a good relationship. If a narcissist give you silent treatment while they pursue other opportunities, then they have little invested in you and you should move on before becoming somebodies back up plan B.

If you are getting silent treatment interpret it as either a form of emotional abuse, or a strong message that this person does not wish to hear from you. Whatever the case may be, the best way to respond to the silent treatment by a girlfriend, boyfriend or ex is to disengage and go about your life. Don’t let the silent treatment give make you crazy for their attention. Find other things to do and other activities to engage in. 

If you find yourself regularly given the silent treatment and caving in to it by ignoring your own needs and boundaries in the relationship, then reconsider the relationship altogether.  Repeated utilization of the silent the treatment is indicative of an emotionally abusive relationship.  It may be time to opt out.

Handle the silent treatment by disengaging and going about your business. Don’t let it get you hysterical

Talk to people that actually want to talk to you back. Lastly, make sure you aren’t completely smothering them because if you leave somebody you are bothering alone they may come back around.   If you push on them it gets you nowhere.  Never teach your boyfriend, girlfriend or ex that they can get a rise out of you by administering the silent treatment or they will utilize this hostile manuever as a punishment tool again and again.

The text message silent treatment

           

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