Have you lost your boyfriend or girlfriend and you really want to win them back? You are not alone! Jake Reilly unplugged completely from social media for 90 days in order to bring his romantic life back in order and get back his girlfriend.
I unplugged from social media including my texting habit of 1500 texts sent out a month, email, cell phones and social networking and got my girlfriend back as a result.
He stopped texting, email, cell phone use and all social media for 90 days calling it his Amish project. Reilly even went so far as to suspending his cell phone service with Verizon and deactivating his facebook, twitter, spotify and linked-in accounts. He had his email blocked with an out of town auto response.
Reilly quit his 1500 text a month habit
Reilly admitted readily that his texting habit alone was around 1500 texts per month and those were just the texts he was sending not receiving. He was also following hundreds of Tweets and wasting about an hour or two a day on Facebook.
Reilly noticed that when he stopped responding to people’s text messages that within about an hour of when they send the text he would get more texts asking What the heck was his problem and didn’t you get the text message I sent texts. People got upset over his ignoring texts calling it socially unacceptable. The social standard is that you should reply if you are on good terms so he really had to shut everything down to stick to the 90 days of being socially unplugged.
During the project Reilly noticed that when his friends got together they were basically just sitting around doing electronics. Texting, playing Words with Friends or Angry Birds, or just idly doing the electronic media thing with a numb trance mind. Even going out to dinner, everyone texts and texts. Reilly did everything from written messages to stopping in somewhere to use a landline if he really had to.
He slowly realized that while he was in touch with far less people as a consequence of being unplugged, he had more free time and increased interation with the people he was seeing. Rather than post status on facebook he had to leave messages tacked to white boards using a real wall not a virtual one.
He started spending more face to face time with his girlfriend
He had a girlfriend he liked who he had broken up with, citing reasons for the breakup being related to drunken text messaging, fights on text, and jealousy over facebook friends and questionable postings.
Many people filter their facebook postings to text message alerts so their facebook walls gets tied into texting and smart phones. Reilly noted the superficial perspective you get on people since they tend to glorify themselves on those sites only posting the best pictures of themselves and a view of their life that is meant to impress.
Once his electronic use was eliminated, those issue became moot points. With respect to his girlfriend situation, he either saw her in person or didn’t. If they talked they did it in person, and if they communicated remotely, they used snail mail. Guess what (should be no surprise) they got along way better as a result!
Take a break from texting and social media to attract your ex back to you
What you can learn from this is that texting, facebook and other media that gives you the ability to remotely pry and snoop into peoples lives can ruin relationships. If you want her or him back and still have the opportunity to see them, then just spend time with them. The better time you have together the more time they will likely want to spend with you.
It’s not to say that you should ignore stark facts like whether a person is married or with someone already as obviously that matters. The point is, that if you shift your focus off texting, facebook, snooping profiles and prying that your relationship may be able to get back on track.
A biggie breakup reason is when you discover that someone you are currently seeing is still active on a dating site while you are dating them. Such electronic sightings might cause you to push for exclusivity way sooner than you should. If they were dating and you didn’t see it in your face through the electronic forums, you wouldn’t be so disturbed about it. After all, you aren’t exclusive until you both say you are.
Stop shooting from the hip like instant chat technology encourages
When you text or echat or skype you tend to shoot from the hip. It’s not like you really think things through. You could very easily call someone a name that they won’t soon forget. A name that can’t be undone. Forcing yourself to hand compose letters eliminates so much potential nasty content. You actually have to think first without just shooting from the hip a text under the table while only half listening or paying attention.
Modern technology can lead you towards very thinly veneered phony relationship. You might be involved with someone that you meet on the net and in reality barely know them other than texting and dates every now and then. This makes for superficial and fleeting relationships and more importantly expendable relationships. If someone creates a headache for you then it’s easy to just say next, click another box or block.
In conclusion, if you spend less time on the electronic mediums such as text, it’s like quitting television, you’ll free up several hours a day with which you can plan or do more fun things. Certain fights particularly those over who is online on dating sites with active profiles, stupid spontaneous comments made on chat or text and friend snooping on text via facebook, would be avoided. If you want your ex back in your life then give your electronics a rest and don’t allow texting to become a conduit for complaining, arguing, fighting and misunderstandings. Try it, because it may help you be able to get your boyfriend or girlfriend back like Reilly did!